Week 25: Simmer Down

Week 24 | Week 26
March 21-27, 2020

I am running on empty. Everything is going well by the numbers. I have committed to the diet, I have worked around the peaks and valleys that have cropped up on my path, and hell, everyone’s path. Life is very different right now. It’s not difficult on the face, but underlying stress is wearing me down. While appreciative of the time I am spending with my family, there is very little opportunity for down time alone with my thoughts. Yeah, I tend to get wrapped up in a video game or chores, but all of them come with constant interruption. My focus is waning, my patience is thinning, my attention is disorderly. I, along with many millions of people on Earth, are spinning our wheels in place. Progress has halted from the highest levels of corporate production to the lowest levels of simply taking a family out for a visit to a park or zoo.

All of this is steadily piling up and I feel the rumble of the avalanche coming. I feel the wall of snow and boulders rushing at 100 miles per hour and I am helpless to evade it. It’s coming. I see it coming.

Finally, I am in these later rounds and I got this guy on the ropes. What’s this? I’m gassed out? Something’s not right. Oh no. I need to slow down, I need to focus.

And while I have pounded and pounded this opponent, no matter how well I do, I feel like the next few seconds could be a surprise counter or an unexpected hook. I hear my corner yelling, but I can’t focus on them. I feel my arm’s tiring, but I can’t give my body the attention it needs. I am swimming stupidly into the current and I don’t even know what’s going on.

He’s doing so well, this fight is going to end soon! This round is absolutely one for the books!

Something is wrong. Something is fucking wrong here.

Week 25 Summary

Fish Tacos? You Bet!
If you look at this page, you can get images and better instructions. Honestly, you just make some tacos with fish. It’s basic. It’s also very healthy and point friendly. Use those low carb tortillas and any fish you may enjoy, and toss together some veggies. That’s about it. Just check it out.

A Brief Refrain
This is typically my spiel about what exercise I have done, but like last week, I really did not do much. I had several 0 point days. You would think I would be sweatin’ up a storm because of the down time, but no. My arm has been a burden this whole time. There is something wrong. I need a doctor, but I also don’t need to catch this bug. CoVid19 is apparently a bad thing for fat diabetics such as myself to catch. I really need to avoid that right now. The fear, however, is that I am going to get it anyway. I am the guy that goes to get provisions. I am the guy who is braving the crowds. I feel irresponsible, but at the same time, I am trying to do the best thing for my people.

I am concerned about a few things on the level I live and thrive in. The stress of the unknown is wearing on me and it is wearing on my wife. Luckily, the kids are impervious to all of this, even though they really miss their grandparents. I am concerned about the availability of the diet food I have been relying on. I’m sure things will catch up, but right now, it’s not available, or very difficult to grab. I am very close to uncorking on people that refuse to participate in all of the things they should be doing to avoid this illness. They are costing lives and causing this to last longer than it needs to.

All of this worry is really hurting me.

P H O T O S

Sharing My Life Story: My First Year As an Official Diabetic
At some point in time during my first year as a classroom teacher I was seeing a brand new doctor. She was good people and she tested my A1C and did all the things to test me. I found out that I was diabetic to the point of like I was on the verge of death. She wanted me immediately to go on insulin and all that jazz. I told her I was dieting at the time (And I was, I was doing a low calorie thing, which was a previous Weight Watchers attempt). In lieu of the needle, she pilled me up with three different meds. The next week I was at school one morning and noticed I was feeling strange. I thought nothing of it.

Eventually I noticed my lips were going numb and I was feeling very weak. I noticed I was feeling sick to my stomach and ultimately I noticed I was losing my ability to form coherent speech. I was having a stroke. (See I read a lot, and I knew I was in such a way that if I didn’t immediately make my presence and state known, I was going to eventually be in an extremely dangerous situation.) I walked out of my classroom and walked aimlessly down the hall.

My mentor saw me and she knew I was not well and she grabbed me by the hand, took me to the nurse, and she took her meter out and my blood sugar was in the 50s. She put white sugar in a cup and said “EAT THAT NOW.” I did and I immediately (and stupidly) drove myself to my doctor. My doctor said “I may have been too aggressive with the medicine” and she told me to hit up the Chinese buffet. I did so happily. For five days I was out of school and I was eating so much food. I took the new round of meds but I left the diet. I was back to eating a bunch of junk and we finished the year out with no incident.

I learned that when your sugar is too low, or at least mine, it feels so much worse when your sugar is too high. I was very close to punching my card that day. My coworkers at my school saved my life. Now I could enjoy summer. Weeee!

Or could I?

To Be Continued…